It was on a Saturday afternoon in April that I learned I was pregnant with Kiri. I had been irritable and anxious all week, wanting to know but afraid of the answer. I had just returned home from helping to clean a neighborhood park in honor of Earth Day, and I didn’t bother to showerContinue reading “All Is Not Fair”
Tag Archives: fear
Links of Hope
When I was pregnant with Kiri, I shared with one doctor a secret. In my heart of hearts, I believe we will bring this baby home. I don’t like to say that aloud because I don’t want to appear arrogant and risk being punished for it. I lived almost every day with Kiri with trepidation.Continue reading “Links of Hope”
This I Believe
This I believe: I am my daughter’s mother. I’ve always recognized that I live a much easier life than many. My native country endured a civil war, I was born amidst it, but I didn’t suffer through it. Instead, my existence—my incessant crying and hunger pangs—put others around me at risk. Still, I didn’t showContinue reading “This I Believe”
August Has Come
I fear August. I fear the slyness and swiftness with which it moves. I fear the beautiful ring of its name: ancient, robust, wise. And I fear the force with which it departs. I feel rattled. Unsteady. Restless. My breaths are short and hurried. My belly quivers. I lost both of my children in theContinue reading “August Has Come”
Taking Them With Me
The night before I was to deliver our daughter, Danith turned to me in bed and said that he would be sure to take pictures of her for me. I said that I would rather he didn’t. He said that one day I would want pictures. I rested my hands on my belly that hadContinue reading “Taking Them With Me”
Fireflies and Daffodils 