The Magic of Not Knowing

The Magic of Not Knowing

Even as an adult I asked mothers why they loved their children.  Their initial response was spiked with indignation.  Why wouldn’t I?  They hadn’t understood that my question was one of sincerity.  Sure, a parent loves her child.  But why?  I loved (and still do) our deceased dog Pluto because of his innocent, tender face … Continue reading

August Has Come

August Has Come

I fear August.  I fear the slyness and swiftness with which it moves.  I fear the beautiful ring of its name: ancient, robust, wise.  And I fear the force with which it departs. I feel rattled.  Unsteady.  Restless. My breaths are short and hurried. My belly quivers. I lost both of my children in the … Continue reading

Taking Them With Me

Taking Them With Me

The night before I was to deliver our daughter, Danith turned to me in bed and said that he would be sure to take pictures of her for me.  I said that I would rather he didn’t.  He said that one day I would want pictures.  I rested my hands on my belly that had … Continue reading

Summer of Growth

Summer of Growth

Growing up, I yearned for what a small house with a green lawn and a white picket fence represented.  I yearned for parents who cherished each other, and who cherished me.  I yearned for what I had read about in books and what I had seen on TV and what I had overheard from classmates: laughter at … Continue reading

Time Of The Fireflies

Time Of The Fireflies

In the summer, nearing the end of twilight exists that time of the day when fireflies emerge and flash their bottom.  They flutter with their long slender black wings, and light from their glowing ends glimmer among the thick grass, holly berry bushes, and maple trees.  While in flight, their bright tails are too finicky … Continue reading